It’s ok to fail: Putting an end to perfectionism
Wanting to succeed and put your best foot forward is natural, and often praised! But if you’re struggling to praise yourself even when you do succeed, but maybe not as much as you’d like or really feel down when you miss the mark, then you could be struggling with unhealthy perfectionism.
Both men and women struggle with perfectionism, and the symptoms of perfectionism can manifest differently in all people. Sometimes unhealthy perfectionism goes unnoticed as we get so many messages in our society to be successful, in control and strong. But if you’re feeling like no matter what you do, it’s never enough and you’re always jumping to the next goal to strive for without taking a break or accepting credit, this can be problematic in the long-term and make you more susceptible to burn out.
If you’re experiencing any of the following, you may want to consider overcoming unhealthy perfectionism:
All or nothing thinking
Being highly critical
Fearing failure
Struggles with work-life balance
Having unrealistic standards
Getting depressed or angry by unmet goals
Self-sabotaging (e.g., procrastination)
Struggling to relax
Perfectionism can be problematic because it can harm you both personally and professionally. Perfectionism has been linked with mental disorders such as anxiety, eating disorders, depression and burnout. Perfection can also impact your self-esteem as your self-worth is seen as outcome based rather than intrinsic. Additionally, if you are compromising your physical and emotional wellbeing for success, eventually you’ll burn out and notice declining performance.
In order to combat perfectionism, you need to learn to challenge your negative thinking, learn to set realistic goals, learn to accept and manage emotions as well as be proactive in taking care of yourself holistically (e.g., sleeping well, socialising, exercising and eating well). If perfectionism is rooted in your sense of self-worth, and something you continuously struggle to navigate independently, it could be beneficial to access professional help to learn to succeed without compromising your wellbeing.
